I Just Completely Blew It
by edurrant0404
Summary: Finn is just starting to forgive Rachel for cheating on him and maybe just maybe they might get back together, but when Finn does something seemingly unforgivable at prom.. all hope might be lost for Finchel. ON HIATUS.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey this is my first fanfic EVER! Im really excited to see what people think… please be completely honest on whether or not I should continue… So enjoy xD**

"Prom, prom, prom" I don't even get what's so special about it. It's held in the gymnasium and all the pastries, punch and girls who seemed to have bathed in perfume doesn't even begin to mask the scent of teenage B.O. and decade old gym equipment. Quinn's going on and on about it as if it was the fricken Royal Ball or something. Girls are going at it like WWE wrestlers for a stupid crown you can buy at the dollar store. I guess it's more of a labeling thing… girls are weird like that. I just want to get prom over with so when Britney and Santana start talking about prom behind me in Algebra 2 I totally tune out and actually LISTEN to Mrs. Hager drone on and on about the importance of factoring binomials when simplifying an equation. That is until I hear Santana say this…

"I cannot believe The Midget is going to prom with Jesse St. Jackass. He made an omelet on her head last year! I know I can't stand her guts and all but I never thought that she was stupid." Hearing Santana's insensitive nickname for Rachel had me spinning around in my seat.

"Wait did you just say that Rachel is going to Prom with Jesse?"

"Didn't you hear Frankenteen? Rachel and Jesse are a total item now. Even though I agree that Jesse is smokin' he's way too big of a jerk even for my taste. Besides I'm dating Kurofsky, if "dating" is what you can call it." Santana replied giving Finn an exaggerated wink.

"Besides what do you care? You broke up with Rachel and are dating Quinn now. Leave Rach and Jesse alone to have their curly haired, big nosed, freakishly talented kids." Britney pitched in.

With that the bell rang and the kids lined out of Math anxiously waiting to escape Mrs. Hager's torturous lecture but I needed to find Rachel and confront her about this rumor. I was relieved when I saw Rachel, books in hand, walking down the hall because she would set the story straight.

I was shocked when she explained how Jesse was joining her, Mercedes, and Sam's "Prom on a Budget" because Jesse barely knows Mercedes and doesn't know Sam AT ALL so of course he was going to this prom just to be with Rachel. That thought brought a surge of jealously coursing through my veins. Wait why am I jealous? I'm dating Quinn, the prettiest, most popular girl at McKinley. But why is it that my stomach starts to churn whenever I see Rachel strutting down the hallway in one of her animal sweaters or looks at me with those big brown eyes like she is now? Oh shit, Finn listen to what she's saying.

She's talking about how it's none of my business of who she dates. Of course I broke up with her but that's because she cheated on me! It's BECAUSE I loved her so much that I broke up with her. It tore my heart to shreds that she did that and I couldn't stand looking at her knowing she didn't feel the same way about me that I did about her. So of course I have a say in who she dates especially if it's a jackass like Jesse who have already hurt her before. She pulls me out of my thoughts when she says "All I ask is that, whoever I choose is that you be as supportive of me as I've been of you and Quinn even though I'm dieing everyday inside about it."

Oh my freaking god. Did she have to say that? I feel like yelling at her and hugging her at the same time because she really does love me. What am I supposed to say to her? Oh shit she's walking away, speak Finn, speak! So I start to tell her about how I don't want to go to this Prom and how Quinn is riding my ass about every little thing revolving around this prom and even though she probably thinks I'm just saying this to make her feel better and I kind of feel like I'm leading her on, hell maybe I am but what I said was the god honest truth.

She completely surprises me by telling me what kind of corsage I should get Quinn. Wasn't she just saying that us being together was like hell to her and now she's helping me please Quinn? I don't know what to say, I'm barely listening to Rachel. I'm just looking into her eyes knowing she's on the verge of tears. I physically have to restrain myself from reaching out and hugging her. I feel like that would just be completely unfair to Rachel considering I'm dating Quinn and I can't just break up with her. But I feel like not only she needs me to hug her but that I need to hug her just so I can feel the familiarity of her face buried into the crook of my neck and my arms wrapped tightly around her small torso, to just make sure that our bodies still fit perfectly together.

But before I decide whether or not to give in to my twitching arms, she walks away and I know that in seconds her eyes will be filled with tears because of me and all I want to do is chase after her, encircle her in my arms, wipe away her tears and kiss her until neither one of us can think about anything or anyone else in the world and believe me I most definitely would've chased after her if we were still dating although if I were still dating her, Rachel wouldn't be walking away in tears but rather so we would be walking down this hallway hand in hand, eyes ablaze with love and contentment. With that thought I can't help but feel a tingle in my palm remembering the rightness of holding Rachel Berry's small, perfectly manicured hand in my rather large, slightly callused one but knowing that as long as I'm dating Quinn, sadly that memory can never be duplicated.


	2. Chapter 2

"Picture time!" Carole shouted, practically tripping over herself trying to run down the stairs and turning on the camera at the same time.

"Come on mom, I got to pick up Quinn and take pictures with her. Ms. Fabray will send you those. Knowing her she'll take hundreds." I replied but really I just wanted to get the hell out of here and get this stupid prom over with.

"Oh come on Finn, I just want a couple of shots of my two boys. Finn, Kurt stand over there by the fireplace. Blaine, I'll take some pictures of just you and Kurt after."

"Okay Mrs. Hudson-Hummel, my parents would also really like if you sent some over to them, if it's no problem for you." Blaine said while Kurt and I moved over to the fire place, Kurt with a beaming smile, hands on hips, and me awkward as always with my hand on Kurt's shoulder.

"Oh my gosh! You two look so cute! Now smile!" Carole snapped a few pictures, smiling so big as if she was the one in front of the camera and not behind it.

A couple of pictures turned into about fifty as Carole made them pose all around the house. Finn checked his watch, 6:30; he had to leave now to pick up Quinn so they can make their reservation at Breadsticks. He grabbed his keys said goodbye to his mom and Burt and told Blaine and Kurt that he'd see them at the dance and headed out the door. Now the real "fun" begins.

I walked up to Quinn's front porch and rang the bell. I was dressed in my rented tux and the light blue bow tie that Quinn gave to me the day before because she said it was the EXACT color of her dress so that we would be "synchronized" and look presentable in front of our peers. But I highly doubt that we would lose votes because my bow tie was slightly off color or her tiara was slightly off center. But you know Quinn; everything has to be P-E-R-F-E-C-T, perfect.

Ms. Fabray opened the door to let me in and called up to Quinn that I was here. She seemed just as excited, If not more than my mom by the looks of the HUGE grin plastered onto her face. I was slightly relieved that Mr. Fabray moved out last year just so I didn't have to sit through the awkward "don't take advantage of my daughter" speech.

I was making small talk with Ms. Fabray trying to give off an exited vibe when I saw Quinn over her shoulder. WOW Quinn looked straight out of a princess movie or something. I couldn't help but tell Quinn that she was the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. I mean anyone would've agreed, Quinn Fabray is HOT but walking down that staircase she looked elegant and exquisite and just simply beautiful. I gave Quinn the corsage that Rachel told me to get and Quinn loved it. For the first time since I've broken up with Rachel I finally felt happy. I was dating the most beautiful girl in Lima and I was happy. Maybe this prom wouldn't be so bad after all.

Suddenly Ms. Fabray walked in right when I was about to kiss Quinn, camera in hand and I guess we were both thinking the same thing because Quinn's mom exclaimed, "Picture time! You look like Cinderella!" and I posed for another set of pictures but this time I didn't mind because I had Quinn on my arm.

Quinn and I arrived at Breadsticks just in time for our 7:15 reservation. When we pulled up I saw the familiar black BMW that belonged to Rachel's dads with the many bumper stickers saying "My Kid's on Honor Roll" or "Think Before You Drink, Don't Drive!" that Rachel told me they got after her great aunt was killed by a drunk driver last winter. As we walked into the restaurant I just hoped that the group wouldn't see us.

Of course not… the booth that Jesse, Rachel, Sam, and Mercedes shared was located RIGHT by the door and to make matters worse, Quinn came running up to them while they were all laughing at something Jesse had said. I couldn't help but remember when I was able to make Rachel laugh like she was now, and it kinda made me hate Jesse a little more that he could bring that beautiful sound out of Rachel and I couldn't. Quinn started to say how they all looked amazing. She was saying it just to win their votes but she had no idea how right she was. Rachel looked stunning. It made me want to take back what I said before about Quinn, how she was "the most beautiful girl I've ever seen". I was caught up in the moment and it momentarily masked the feelings in my heart for Rachel but seeing Rachel now brought all those emotions back even stronger.

She had her hair up and curled in a delicate pony tail. Her makeup was perfectly simple and brought out the softness of her features. She had on simple jewelry to match with her simple baby pink dress. Everything Rachel had on was simple but it played up her natural beauty and she took my breath away.

I couldn't help but snap at Jesse due to my jealousy, "Hey Jesse, what'd you order? Scrambled eggs?... I mean I know you usually like them served on people's heads." I said in my best overly sarcastic tone. Then he started telling Quinn how good she looked and how he'd be happy to step in if I stepped on her toes. I seriously would've brought my fist right up to his pretty little face if it weren't for Mercedes who interrupted to stop the verbal back-and-forth. She didn't want us to ruin the prom vibe so told us we looked great then nicely told us to back off agreeing that we'd see each other at the prom.

When Quinn and I took our seats at our own table, thankfully very far away from the other four, Quinn started fuming at me. "What the hell was that?"

"Huh? What do you mean?" I replied clueless.

"What? You being nasty to Jesse when he was being completely nice and respectful, that's what!"

"Nice? Jesse St. James is a lot of things and NICE is definitely not one of them. Last year him and the rest of those Vocal Adrenaline, soulless robots chucked eggs at Rachel!" I snapped back remembering Rachel last year, talking about how he betrayed her and me vowing to myself that I would never let Rachel go through that kind of hurt ever again.

"Well obviously Rachel and Jesse put aside their differences and got over it and you should too, now let's just forget about this whole thing and enjoy our prom." Quinn finished as the waiter came up to greet them and take their beverage orders.

After Quinn ordered her glass of ice water and him, his Pepsi, he started to think that maybe Jesse had changed and maybe this whole feud was pointless and all in his head. He decided that he would watch Jesse and Rachel all night to see if maybe Rachel was right and Jesse wasn't Jesse St. Jackass anymore, I mean Mercedes and Sam seemed to like him now. Or maybe Finn just wanted to keep an eye on them all night so he could continue to take in the beauty of Rachel in her sweet little pink dress and maybe watching her be happy with someone else could help him move on from his love for Rachel Berry.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the alerts and hits and stuff! It's nice to know my writing doesn't suck COMPLETELY! Oh I forgot to say on my last chapters that I OWN NOTHING. Keep reading and enjoy xD**

Quinn and I walked into Prom at EXACTLY 8:10 because she said it was the perfect time to seem eager but not too eager and laid back but not lazy. But honestly I don't even think anyone noticed us when we walked through the door. The gym was disguised pretty well and actually looked somewhat classy. There were like A MILLION twinkling lights and a HUGE disco ball. I noticed everyone was really into the song that Puck, Artie, and Sam were singing. Don't get me wrong, those guys are great singers and my best friends but NO ONE can sing Friday and not come off as a complete fool. The bad lyrics accomplished that themselves.

I scanned the gymnasium for Rachel. She was in the middle of the crowd dancing with Jesse St. Jerk-Off. They were dancing very enthusiastically to the glee boy's song. At least he wasn't touching her, THAT would push me off the edge. Mercedes was not with Rachel and Jesse and Sam was on stage. That only meant one thing, Jesse being the jackass like he is, asked Rachel to dance and left poor Mercedes all alone. I noticed Mercedes off in the corner and said to Quinn, "Oh hey I see Mercedes over there at that table, let's go talk to her."

"Um okay Finn, but I never thought you and Mercedes were really friends?" Quinn answered confused.

"Well were not but why not start now, eh?" with that I started off towards Mercedes table. As soon as I was within ear shot of her I shouted out, "Hey Mercedes, where are your dates?" in my most friendly manner.

"Oh hey Finn, Quinn. Guess who I voted for Prom King and Queen!" exclaimed, giving us wink," Oh and Sam's on stage and Jesse and Rachel are over there." She then pointed out on the dance floor even though I already knew exactly where they were.

"Wait Jesse just asked Rachel to dance and left you all alone over here?" My anger was boiling, not because I felt bad for Mercedes, and believe me I did, but mostly just because I didn't want Jesse ANYWHERE near my Rachel. Wait, MY Rachel? What am I thinking? I have to let this go. I'm dating Quinn and I can't worry about Rachel anymore. She's an amazing, caring person and she deserves to give her love to someone. But I CANNOT let that person be Jesse. "Mercedes, I'm going to talk to Jesse right now about his heartlessness." I started heading over to Jesse and Rachel ready to punch his head off of his shoulders.

"Wait no, Finn stop!" I heard Mercedes shout out and I turned around to look at her. "Jesse didn't ask Rachel to dance, he wouldn't do that, he's been a perfect gentleman tonight. RACHEL asked ME if it was okay to ask HIM to dance alone with HER. And I said yes. They seem to be reconnecting. We may have another St. Berry romance on our hands." Mercedes said smiling.

Quinn pitched in. "I never thought I would say this but, I'm happy for Rachel. I mean now that Jesse graduated, he isn't in Vocal Adrenaline anymore and that means he really, truly likes her."

All of this new information was trying to register in his head. Jesse actually cares about Rachel? Rachel actually LIKES Jesse? What have I done? In my heart I always knew that Rachel and I would wind up rocking our grand children on our front porch I just never figured out the middle parts. I always loved Rachel since we first sang Don't Stop Believing and not ONCE through all this shit we went through have I stopped. I always thought that she would love me and I could be with her when I figured everything out, but now she's dancing with another guy, laughing, having a good time and my heart is breaking and I keep hearing five year olds singing in my head, "Rachel and Jesse sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in the baby carriage!" UGH! I messed EVERYTHING up! I suck! I had Rachel and she was mine, I'm a "Lima Loser" and will stay here living a mediocre life while Rachel and Jesse prance around fucking Broadway!

I realized Mercedes and Quinn are staring at me, waiting to say something and so I blurt out,"Um, I have to go to the bathroom." I left the table, Mercedes and Quinn looking after me dumbfounded. I slam the bathroom stall closed and cry. Finn Fucking Hudson is crying in the boys' bathroom at Prom. Because he's a reputation obsessed loser and the love of his life is out there with another guy just because he didn't have the balls to tell her when she confessed to me that it killed her to see me a Quinn together that I loved her and she's the ONLY girl I've ever wanted to go to Prom with. It wasn't because of the gym or the tacky decorations or running for Prom King that I didn't want to go, I just realized it now but the real reason I thought this Prom was stupid is because I wasn't going to it with Rachel Berry.


	4. Chapter 4

** Thanks everyone who has been adding me to their alerts list and the reviews I've gotten! Just reached 1000 Hits! Woohoo! Well thanks again and please review... It's going to get reeeeal good soon. Oh and I don't own glee!**

After 10 minutes of sulking in the bathroom I finally found the courage to leave and I knew exactly what I was going to do. I was going to march up to Quinn and tell her that this relationship wasn't working out and that we were only together because of the peer pressure and our images and that I was done with it, then I'm going to find Rachel and tell her that I love her and that I didn't want to go to this prom with anyone else but her and if I have to make a scene to get her to listen to me, I will because I don't care if I look like a loser anymore as long as I have her.

I walked up to Quinn confident. She looked kinda pissed and so I looked away from her questioning, judging, angry gaze. And that's when I noticed Rachel walking up to the stage ready to sing her song… the orchestra started to play a slow rhythmic beat. Ugh seriously? RACHEL is singing THE slow song. The song I was planning to dance with her. The song that was supposed to bring us together and it would be forever OUR song. Great, just great.

I reached Quinn, no longer confidence holding up my head."Where the hell were you? You missed THREE songs! I looked like an idiot standing over here by myself!" Quinn commanded.

"I'm sorry Quinn, but…" I began ready to break Quinn Fabray's heart if it meant that I would get Rachel back in my arms.

She cut me off, "You know whatever. Just dance." And with that she pulled me out onto the dance floor as Rachel began to sing.

Rachel always takes my breath away when she sings. Her voice is like a whole chorus of angels. With her voice and how she looks right now, I'm sure. I'm sure that I can never love any girl as much as I love Rachel Berry. Even if she doesn't know it, we are soul mates. God (and ) brought us together and we can't screw it up.

I actually begin to listen to the lyrics and I recognized it as the song that plays over and over again on the radio. What's it called, Collecting Hearts? Jar of Scars? Now that just sounds gross. Oh yeah, It's called Jar of Hearts and right now Rachel is staring at me while hitting every note perfectly.

The lyrics are like a straight bitch-slap to my heart and I feel like I want to go crawl in a hole and die because as Rachel and I practically have a staring contest across the gymnasium, I know she means every word that comes out of her mouth. It's killing me as she tells me through song how much I've hurt her and it comes to my realization that I'm a complete and utter DICK! I've treated Rachel just as badly as Jesse St. James, if not worse. She told me, she never loved him and she had friends to support her when he straight out told her that he didn't like her anymore and never talked to her since. With him it was like ripping of a band-aid, short period of pain and then over and done with. I led her on for months before I did ANYTHING and then when I had her, I dumped her within a week because a wanted to be my inner Rock star, then I finally had her again and I promised I would NEVER break up with her and the second she does something because she was hurt and angry because I LIED to her, I go back on my promise and now I've been leading her on again for months. I NEED to tell her how I feel; I can't stand knowing that she's angry at me. Tomorrow, I'll tell her tomorrow, this way I can give Quinn the prom she wanted and then gently break up with her, because I need to stop being such an asshole to girls.

Five songs went by and I didn't like at all the way Quinn was hanging all over me as if she were the drapes to my window. What I didn't like even more was the same way Rachel was draped all over Jesse, but the difference was, Jesse liked it, and I didn't.

Blaine, Britney, and Tina got up and sang their song and with each passing line of the song, Jesse and Rachel got closer and closer. My uninterrupted gaze at them saw Jesse leaning in closer a closer to Rachel's neck, his lips making way to her ear, I saw Jesse start to nibble on it, Rachel laughing. I SNAPPED.

I didn't care if Quinn hated me and never talked to me again but I had to get Jesse away from MY girl. I gently pushed Quinn aside, making my way over to Rachel and the hormone gorilla. Rachel saw me coming first and with a panic stricken face tried to push Jesse away.

I got their first and flung him off her saying, "Hey dude, keep it PG." I don't know why I said that, I mean half the other couples around us were doing the same exact thing. It wasn't the action that pissed me off, it was the person. He started talking smack about how she wasn't my girlfriend so therefore none of my business. He's right; a normal guy wouldn't be saying this if she wasn't his girlfriend but I'm not a normal guy. I'm a guy hopelessly, completely, unconditionally in love with the girl that is now shying away from me.

I wanted to just hit him, for everything that either directly or indirectly he ever caused. So I did. He hit back and it went back and forth, back and forth, our dates desperately but unsuccessfully trying to pull us off each other.

That's when Coach Sylvester came up and ripped us apart. She called us some names that didn't make sense and started pulling us towards the exit doors. Damn, I'm gonna have to explain this to Rachel tomorrow when I talk to her about US. Sylvester pushed both of us outside of the school and exclaimed, "Stay out here, and DON'T come back in or else." With that she closed the big metal doors.

Jesse started to walk towards his car to the parking lot. He was NOT leaving until I was done with him. "Where the hell do you think you're going, were not done."

"I think we are, your just a pathetic loser who wants his skinny, blond girlfriend for his reputation and have poor Rachel on the side, always leading her on just in case you lose all your popularity, you can have her just so you don't feel completely alone. I know I've been a jackass to Rachel but I've changed, I'm someone Rachel can follow her dreams with, I won't hold her back. You are a Lima-Loser and will always be one." Jesse retorted. Jesse was right and that's what made me want to punch him even more.

I lunged toward Jesse, knocking him down. After a bit of struggling, I had him pinned to the pavement. Punch, after punch with Pretty Boy trying to shield his face had me letting everything out; my jealousy, my love, my hatred, my self- loathing, the lies, the cheats, everything. I was seeing red, not because of blood; I had not one scratch on me, but because of the cold rage pulsing through my veins, seeping through my entire body.

I didn't hear a small beautiful voice call out, "Finn! Stop it! You're hurting him! Get off! Please!" I didn't feel the small arms desperately trying to pull me away, but failing miserably. What I did feel was the crunch of bones when my elbow hit something behind me. It was not Jesse's nose, which had broken a few punches ago. I turned around to see Rachel on the ground behind me, clutching her face.

My blood ran cold, my façade of rage washed out of me. I took in my surroundings, Jesse was bleeding, A LOT but thank god I could tell he was still alive because of the slow ragged breath extruding from his mouth along with coughs of more and more blood. Rachel looked at me with tear filled, scared eyes.

"Oh my god, Rachel! I'm so sorry, I didn't know you were behind me, I didn't mean too. I'm so, so sorry." I tried, making my way towards her, pleading with her to understand.

"Get the fuck away from me!" it was the first time I have ever heard Rachel Berry curse and it was directed at me. "Get away! You're a monster! Get away from us!" The tears began to fall down her face along with the blood flowing from her nose." I had broken Rachel's nose before but that was because of my crappy dance moves, and of course she forgave me. But this time it was because her attempts to stop me from almost KILLING a guy who had done nothing but love the same girl I love.

Rachel was right, I am a monster.


	5. Authors Note

**Hey guys! It's been almost two weeks since my last update :'( I'm having HORRID writers block… Some of my friends are trying to help by presenting me with some ideas… but nothing has been like a WOW factor yet, maybe some of you guys can help me think of some things and I PROMISE I'll give you credit! I'll try to post the next chapter soon! Thanks!**


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